Out of the Depths

“Out of the depths have I cried unto thee, O Lord.” — Psalm 130:1

I can remember reading this one night as I struggled with the overwhelming darkness that seemed to envelop me. I believe I had read it before, but that night it spoke to me as I realized, “Wow, David knew what it was like to be depressed.”

Yes, out of the depths of the incredible despair that I felt, I cried out to God that night. That was decades ago. Through those years, God through the person of the Holy Spirit became my psychoanalyst.*

Experiences of the past long forgotten surfaced and with each I was able to confess it, claim the forgiving power and be cleansed of the past, even the rejection of a father I was able to be healed from because I believed His promises, claimed them and came out victorious.

You know, it’s easy to write the above paragraph, but please remember that this was over years. I had to keep claiming those promises, often with fear and tears.

I remember, at the age of 14, singing often and identifying with the old negro spiritual, “Sometimes I Feel Like a Motherless Child.”

Sometimes I feel like a motherless child

Sometimes I feel like a motherless child

Sometimes I feel like a motherless child

A long way from home, a long way from home

 

Sometimes I feel like I’m almos’ gone

Sometimes I feel like I’m almos’ gone

Sometimes I feel like I’m almos’ gone

And a long way from home, a long way from home

 

True believer

True believer

But a long, long way from home, a long, long way from home

Quite a mournful tune for a 14-year old! But God hears. I wasn’t a Christian then, but years later I finally became a Christian, after learning that Jesus didn’t just die for the world, but that He died for Fran Gourdet, Psalm 27:10, ” When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up” took the place of that solemn tune. God had been working on me over the years and now that I had given my heart to Him, He began working in me.

Just today, I was reading in the devotional, My Life Today, “The trials of life are God’s workmen to remove the impurities, infirmities, and roughness from our characters, and fit them for the society of pure, heavenly angels in glory The fire will not consume us, but only remove the dross, and we shall come forth seven times purified, bearing the impress of the Divine.” Isaiah 69:3 reminds us that “In all our afflictions, He was afflicted.” We may be a long way from home, but God suffers with us, He is “fixing” us, which really means preparing us.

So, I’m guessing that I didn’t make you feel any better reading this post, but I hope you understand that regardless of what you are experiencing and feeling, your heavenly Father not only knows, but is experiencing it with you. You can call out to Him from the depths and He does hear you. In my next post, I’ll share a secret that helped me to cooperate with Him in pulling me out of the depths of despair. It’s not for everyone, but for some, it will be freeing.

*A psychoanalyst works with you on the basis that your subconscious memories as the source of your current difficulties, rather than focusing on your conscious memories
Fran Gourdet works nights as a computer support specialist at a large New York City law firm. She loves to serve and enjoys sharing the Good News of the Gospel and it’s freeing power. She also works as an Abide Counseling Coach and facilitates the Sunday morning coaching calls. She enjoys Sabbaths at the Haitian congregation she attends in Mount Pocono, PA.
.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *